Halo Wars 2
Halo Whores 2 is an RTS game where you train and compulsively rape troops to destroy bases. Plot: 10,000 years after the events of halo wars, the UNSC spirit of burning has arrived on a mysterious forerunner relic...although it’s only mysterious to the crew as you would have known for years now. Anyhow the AI of the ship died and unfortunately they have no one to replace her except the whiny piece of ass, Anders. After Anders gives Spartan Jerome some much-needed wake-up sex, they go down to the relic. Then in a DEUS ex machina, they discover a human outpost full of neo-Nazi brutes. Anders, having changed from an Asian to a German, is extremely offended by this, and proceeeds to launch archer missiles at them without cooldown. Due to her obvious hacking, she is raped by the reverse aging Captain Slicer, and is put in the corner to think about she did. Unfortunately in the battle, everything useful was destroyed except the discount Chinese knock-off version of Serena, who just cried about how she lost her crew all the time. After some stupid skirmishes involving Atriox’s bitch, Captain Slicer decides that he want a hot new brute girlfriend, unfortunately the only hot female brute was on a banished carrier. He sent Jerome and Isabel to ask her out for him, as she was the daughter of Atriox. Unfortunately, while they were waiting for the brute to get ready for her date, Jerome found some amazing porn, and forced Isabel to download it for him in some sort of digital rape. This caused Atriox’s Norton anti-virus software to activate, quickly destroying the computer it was supposed to protect. Now that computer was the glassing beam control, this caused the ship to start glassed the ark. Then the sentinels decided to finally do they’re fucking job, and went kamikaze on their ass. Due to not being able to ever get any quality porn without pissing off some army, Jerome attempted to kill himself by jumping off the carrier. Fortunately for literally ever other crew member of the Spirit of burning his gruntiness exceeded possible levels and he briefly became god, this, along with the rift of fluffy hair he took from one of the neo-Nazis, allowed him to survive. Due to losing his toy and favorite Christmas present (the shipmaster REALLY likes Christmas) Atriox threw a tantrum and attempted to use the halo ring under construction as a bus. Anders, finally out of her timeout, gave Jerome some strip-teases to give him his love of life back, then demanded he take her somewhere nice, like forge used to before he became a literal star. Jerome, being Jerome, thought that a warzone would be the most romantic place to have a date, so went to the halo ring with around 30,000 marines. Unfortunately Captain sharp thing wanted to get back together with Atriox’s daughter one last time before his reverse aging turned him into a seven year old. The double date went okay, until Anders got lost in the bathroom and accidentally activate the defense system. This pissed off Atriox, so he decided to disown his daughter for being a humans slut, and attacked the ring with a wraith swarm. Eventually after a big pretty battle, Anders managed to get some pretty red energy shields activated and won the battle. After this Anders decided to leave on the ring due to wanting a peice of that master chiefs ass. DLC: There were some leaders added I guess, but the only one that matters is Yapyap THE DESTROYER. He rose through the ranks due to having a gruntiness level exceeding even Sargent Avery Johnson’s Johnson, and eventually became a high prophet, and took 78.99% of the grunts from Atriox and formed the most grunty covenant yet.